Posted in Live, Love


It is natural to every man to wish for distinction, and for the praise of those who can confer honor by their praise. . . (Sydney Smith)

It is a sunny summer day here as I look out to the city streets and all those making their way across the city at this mid-morning hour. As is often the case, I am feeling buoyed by the kindness and connection of those I admire and care about. In this age of email and text communication which is replacing so much of the long-hand letter writing I still enjoy, I cherish every opportunity to share words of wisdom, wonder, and wellness.

I am often inspired afresh by spoken or written words of collegiality, compassion, and care while also energized by every such word I send in return. Although it is true that one almost always “catches more flies with honey than vinegar,” there is no mistaking that kind words make our social world a warmer, happier, more dignified place. Words of warm regard are sweet indeed to the human heart.

As my dear sister and I have often talked about, deep down everyone longs to be special. . . and in the most spiritual sense, we are! No matter how effusive or purplish it may seem, I believe that we must err upon the side of encouragement rather than discouragement whenever possible.

While we may have an intuitive or empathetic inkling what it may be like to walk in another’s shoes at times or to sense if we are having a positive or negative effect upon the life of another, we cannot know often or long. This, of course, is the rich and dynamic mystery of human life and relations but it’s also the crux of all misunderstanding and miscommunication. Whether heartfelt connection, devastating heartbreak, or any point in between, so much depends on our ability to fully and deeply see, understand, and appreciate others for who they are as they are.

Lacking the time and ability to project ourselves into the mind, heart, and soul of another in the hurly-burly-bizziness of everyday life, I believe in one overriding default position: “give a little love.”

No matter how tired or over-used it may seem (rather like the word “sweetie” served up warm and sweet like syrup by the waitress at the local diner), giving a little love keeps everything moving along.

So, with all the luxury and idealism that writing across time and space afford me , I’ll go one further. I’ll sign off by sending a whole lot o’ love!



Kalen Marquis is the therapist, educator and human bean who founded Kwil.Club with frizzy-fuzzy, green-nosed Kwil. He is a registered clinical counsellor in private practice in New Westminster, BC. He has more than two decades of experience as a teacher, teacher-librarian and school counsellor.